JOY

Yesterday, I FINALLY heard the message God has been trying to give me for several days if not longer.  The last several times I've put myself out there publicly, in the course of my new job, there has been at least one person that has asked me, "Are you enjoying what you're doing?"  It took several repetitions of that question (word for word from different people) for me to finally realize it was really God's voice asking me that question through them, reminding me of an important instruction we are given in Philippians: "Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice." (Philippians 4:4 KJV)

As I've shared previously, I've been struggling with feeling I haven't always done as good a job as I would have liked.  That in turn turned into fear that I wouldn't do so, and a vicious cycle started where fear kept me from doing as good a job as I ordinarily would have done.  I've been obedient to move forward as God directs, despite my fear - leaning on His strength - but my attitude has not been particularly joy-filled.  I've been VERY serious as I've tried to do my best (and too often failed to do so!).  Yesterday, I finally "got it".  I am to be doing this with JOY!!!!  

I've had plenty of experience to know that it's possible to "try too hard" and get in our own way.  My husband and I have done that with dance as we've worked to learn new steps.  And we've physically seen the difference it makes when we relax and try the move without all the tension we create when we "try too hard".  But what does it mean to try too hard?  Today I see that at least part of it is that when we try too hard, we have let go of the joy and become too serious.  So, today I pray with the Psalmist: 

"Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and let a willing attitude control me." (Psalms 51:12 ISV)

That word "salvation" is one of those words that is used so often in religious circles that it's meaning has been obscured - at least for me.  As I looked up the word in it's original language in Strong's concordance, this is what I found it to mean "liberty, deliverance, prosperity".  I'm told it's from a primative root meaning "to be open, wide or free, i.e. (by implication) to be safe".  Liberty, deliverance, prosperity, to be open and free, to be safe.  What a wonderful thing!  And certainly joy producing.

It's all well and good to talk about rejoicing and living in joy instead of being so serious all the time, but how do I get there?  I'm naturally a pretty serious person.  As I ask my Father and Guide these questions, I remember my Toastmaster's training.  As a part of each meeting, the call went out to ask whether anyone had anything to share "for the good of the order".  What this question really meant was, "Who has a joke to share?"  A joke, assuming it's clean and not mean in nature, has a wonderful power to relieve tension and help folks relax and feel joy instead of trying too hard.  The thought comes that sharing a joke will not only help me relax, but my students as well!  A win-win for both of us.  An interesting thought, and I suddenly feel much lighter and relaxed as I think about my next opportunity to step out in faith and do what I've been lead to do! 

Thank you, Father!  Indeed your yoke is easy and your burden is light.  Thank you for lifting my burdens as I yoke (and joke!) with you!  Thank you for the reminder that while I am to do what you give me to do with my might, that doesn't mean I have to lose my joy in the process!  Thank you for your many blessings to me, my Father, and for the liberty, deliverance, prosperity, freedom, and safety that is your gift to me.  Thank you for your guidance and direction in my life.  I once again seek your will this day, my Father.  May you continue to work in me both to will and to do of your good pleasure - and to turn my weeping into joy as you've promised!  The words of a song come to mind:

Joy, joy, my heart is full of joy,

Joy, joy, my heart is full of joy,

Because my Savior watches over me,
That's the reason that my heart is full of joy!

Thank you, Father! Thank you!