I Rejoice!

The story of Hannah as told in the first few chapters of 1 Samuel is quite moving.  And I find Hannah's prayer as recorded in the first 10 verses of chapter 2 quite thought provoking.  Hannah has been tormented for years, wanting a child desperately and having Peninnah goad her about her barrenness.  She promises God that if He will just give her a son, she will give Him to the Lord.  She is given a son, and when he is weaned, she brings him to the temple to leave him with the high priest to be raised by him in service to God.  The prayer I mentioned in chapter 2 is her prayer when she brings Samuel to stay with Eli.  Can you imagine how she must have been feeling, knowing that when she returned home, it would be without the son she had prayed for so long?  

I know if it had been me, I'd have had a hard time behaving as Hannah did.  I'd probably have been really torn.  Having made a promise to God, I would want to fulfill it, but could have found all sorts of reasons why it might not be a good idea to leave him with Eli.  Just look how his OWN sons turned out!  I'd likely be quite worried about leaving my son, and very sad about it at the very least.  But that is not Hannah's attitude.  She is clearly a "cheerful giver" (2 Cor 9:7), focusing not on her impending loss, but her immense gratitude for God's giving her a son.  In her prayer, she says:

"My heart exults in the Lord. . . I rejoice in thy salvation" (I Sam 2:1, NASV)

and goes on to talk about how wonderful God is.  And lest you think she was just one of those mothers who didn't care about her child, that thought is dispelled by the fact that she carefully made him clothes each year and brought them to him (I Sam 2:19).  Remember this was before a time when one could just go out and purchase cloth and zip something up with an electric sewing machine!

For me, this story speaks to me on so many levels - especially about the power of prayer, and the importance of cheerfulness & joy - especially when giving gifts to God!

Father, once again I am reminded of how you encourage us to rejoice and give thanks in ALL THINGS.  I am so grateful for your love and care for me!  Thank you for this special time of rest and relaxation that you have provided, and thank you for the renewed energy to return to the work you have given me to do.  May I do my work cheerfully as a gift to those I serve, and in gratitude to you for the many gifts you have given me - including these current tasks! (Eccl 3:13)  Father, I love you!

Relic or Relationship?

For several days I've been thinking about the stories in the first seven chapters of 1 Samuel.  I've already shared some things from the first three chapters.  Today's illustration focuses on the 2nd, 3rd and 4th chapters where we hear of how badly Eli's sons abused the office of priest.  And how God warned Eli that they would both die on the same day.  Today's story is the fulfillment of that promise.  When the Israelites went to battle with the Philistines and were defeated by them, they started asking why God hadn't given them the victory.  They decided they needed to take the ark of the covenant with them into the next battle to ensure their victory.  So Eli's sons brought the ark to the battle.  The Israelites were soundly defeated, the ark taken by the Philistines, and Eli's sons killed.  The picture I have in the upper left corner of the page (created using a free download from Kidco Labs), really speaks to me of the lack of respect Eli's son's were showing as they carried the ark into battle.

As I pondered the story, I began to contrast it with the story of King David's relationship with the ark as recorded in 1 Chronicles.  He said to all the people, "If it seems good to you and if it is the will of the Lord our God, let us send word far and wide to the rest of our people throughout the territories of Israel, and also to the priests and Levites who are with them in their towns and pasturelands, to come and join us. Let us bring the ark of our God back to us, for we did not inquire of it during the reign of Saul. (1 Chron 13:2,3 NIV)  In the next couple of chapters there are several examples of Him asking God about going to battle with their enemies and proceeding as God told him to proceed. 

I realized that with the lack of respect for God, the ark, and the office of the priesthood that Eli's sons exhibited, the ark had been relegated to a religious relic - an artifact that they began to believe had power in itself to win their battles.  By contrast, King David treated the ark with utmost respect as a reminder of the need to seek God's guidance.  So, what about me?  Do I relate to something as a relic when I should be focusing on relationship?

Father, do I ever treat religious objects as what has the power, rather than looking directly to You? My first thought is, certainly not! I don't even have any "religious relics".   Quick on the heels of that thought, however is the thought - what about the Bible?  Are there time's I've been content to simply read the Bible and feel I've "spent my time with God" - rather than taking the time to listen deeply within my soul for that still small voice of God speaking to me?  

As I ponder these things, I find myself right back where I was as I create the previous page!  "Speak Lord for thy servant HEARETH!" (1 Sam 3:10 KJV).  Father, you know that right now I need your direction in my life in a special way.  You know the challenge I am facing and how I'm really not sure what to do.  Father, please give me direction and make it very clear to me how I should proceed.  I don't want to be in the position of straining at gnats and swallowing camels.  I don't want to be so rooted in legalism that I make life harder than it needs to be.  But I also don't want to ignore things that are important.  Too often, I don't know where I fall on that line, Father, but you do.  Please guide my thoughts and actions as I seek to do Your will, Father.  May I be courageous enough to do what you would have me do - even if that is a very uncomfortable place to be.  But may I also be willing to bend if that is what is called for.  Father, please direct me this day!  Thank you!

Speak Lord

As you may have noticed by the words on my Bible Cover, I want God to speak to me.  I want Him to guide and direct me in my life.  But as I was contemplating these words in I Samuel 3:9&10, I realized a very important concept that Eli taught young Samuel.  He was to say, "Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening." (NRSV)  

LISTENING!  Why is it so much easier for me to focus on what I want from God, instead of what He needs from me?  I want Him to speak, but how much focus do I put on LISTENING?  

This brings to mind the passage in John where Jesus said, "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me." (John 10:27, NRSV)  I note that this is the prelude to one of the promises I cling to.  As the Names of God version puts it: "My sheep respond to my voice, and I know who they are. They follow me, and I give them eternal life. They will never be lost, and no one will tear them away from me. My Father, who gave them to me, is greater than everyone else, and no one can tear them away from my Father." (John 10:27-29, NOG)

Father, I am so grateful that NO one can pluck me out of your hand - not even me by doing something stupid!  Father, I choose to LISTEN and RESPOND - to FOLLOW you however you lead.  Thank you for holding me in your hand and keeping ANYONE from snatching me away from you. 

Increased Stature

1 Samuel 2:26 says:

"Now the boy Samuel continued to grow both in stature and in favor with the Lord and with the people." (NRSV)

This verse really caught my eye because of its similarity to Luke 2:52:

"And Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and with people." (NET)

Most of us want to be in favor with God and with people. There are two ways to increase in stature - the literal physical way, and the more figurative way of increasing in visibility and power.  Most of us are finished with the physical increase in stature.  So far as the figurative way is concerned, some of us want to increase in stature and some of us don't.  I'm one of those who isn't so interested in increased stature, preferring to quietly go about my work behind the scenes.  But that's not the way God is leading in my life right now.  Just as a child has no control over his growth in stature, if I continue to do as God directs, it doesn't look like I'll be able to avoid such growth either.  What I DO have some say in is growth in favor with God and people.  Proverbs 3:3-4 says:

"Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, Write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good repute In the sight of God and man." (NASB)

This is my prescription - focus on kindness and truth if I want to grow in favor with God and people.  Each of these can indirectly be a challenge for me, though I care deeply about the people around me and try my best to always be factual in my dealings.  

For example, I choose to focus on kindness, but I can have "tunnel vision" at times.  I can be so focused on my current task, that I don't pay attention to the people around me who need kindness from me.  Obviously such behavior can detract from finding favor with people! 

The other piece of this - truth - is an interesting concept.  What is truth?  Jesus said that He is "the way, the truth, and the life"  (John 14:6 - NASB)  The challenge for me with truth is that I can get so caught up in human perception of things that I miss the truth of God's power and grace that can improve any situation.  THAT is the truth - not the appearances all around me!

Father, thank you for your truth!  Truly in "Your presence is fullness of joy"! (Ps 21:6, NASB)  I am so grateful, Father!  You always have my best interests at heart.  Life goes so much better with you in it!  Father, I ask this day that kindness and truth be a continual focus in my life and that I am able to continually be aware of the needs of your children when you want me to be interacting with them in a kind and loving way!  May I always remember the truth of your power and goodness rather than believing in appearances, Father.  I love you!

Healed & Happy

I've spent the last several days pondering the story of Hannah. Clearly she had a caring husband, who noticed how sad she was and that she wasn't eating.  He tried to cheer her up, but no amount of attention on his part could have taken away the pain she was facing. To want a child so badly, watch a rival have child after child, and then be harassed about not being able to conceive would have been so hard.  And then to make matters worse, as she was praying to God with all the pain and longing of her heart, the priest accused her of being drunk!  

One of the things that stood out to me was that when her prayer ended and she was done talking to Eli, she went her way and "ate and her face was no longer sad". (1 Sam 1:18 NASV).  It reminded me of Psalms 40:4 that says "Happy is the person who trusts in the Lord" (NCV).  When we truly believe our prayers have been answered, our behavior will change - even before any outward sign of the miracle has shown up.

And yet, God whispers to me that this is not an act.  This is not us simply saying, okay God, I'm going to trust you and "act as if".  Sometimes when we do that, we're actually in the state described in 2 Tim 3:5 - "Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof" (KJV).  I find myself comparing Hannah's story with a couple of others:

• Jacob wrestling with God and saying, “I won’t let you go, unless you bless me.”  
• Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane saying, "O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me" and later "O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done."

The picture I see here, is one of praying until we CLEARLY receive an answer.  This isn't just a quick prayer and an "okay I'll trust you, God".  This is praying until we KNOW the answer is on its way (whether it's what we wanted or not!) and we can face the situation, filled with God's power.  Jesus spent hours praying about the situation He was facing.  How can we think we can get away with less?  

Father, I want this experience with the challenge I am facing right now.  I want to pray until I KNOW healing has occurred!  But I really don't know how to do that.  Once I've discussed the situation with you, what more is there to say?  I know you love me and want this healing for me.  What is it that takes it from "want" to "happening now"?  What is it that must occur so that you can fill me with your power?  

In the past, I've struggled with the concept of persevering in prayer.  I know even Jesus taught that it was something we needed to do in the parable about the widow and the judge:

"And he spake a parable unto them to this end, that men ought always to pray, and not to faint; Saying, There was in a city a judge, which feared not God, neither regarded man: And there was a widow in that city; and she came unto him, saying, Avenge me of mine adversary. And he would not for a while: but afterward he said within himself, Though I fear not God, nor regard man;Yet because this widow troubleth me, I will avenge her, lest by her continual coming she weary me. And the Lord said, Hear what the unjust judge saith. And shall not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them? I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth? (Luke 18:1-8, KJV)

I've found this concept hard to understand.  If we keep badgering God about something, isn't that the same as not trusting Him? But the picture that is emerging is about praying about something until we receive an answer and a sense of peace about the situation.  As long as we are struggling within ourselves about the situation, we are NOT there yet!  We need to "badger" God until we are!  

I think of a story I've read recently about a woman who was quite ill for YEARS. She sought God about it all that time, and only after many years did she experience full healing.  I suspect the story of Hannah represents something similar.  Though the story here in first Samuel doesn't specify, I suspect that this was not the first time Hannah was distressed about her barrenness and prayed about it.  Clearly part of the answer is that the time was not right until this point.  So I'm once again back to the question.  Don't we need to trust God that He will bring about the healing when the time is right?  How does that jibe with continuing to badger Him about something? 

Father, I really want to understand this.  I KNOW it is an important piece for experiencing your power more fully in my life. Father, how do I get there?  It's like I can see the destination, but there is some sort of invisible wall preventing me from reaching it.  What needs to change, Father?  I want the healing and I know you want me to have it.  What needs to change?

As I write these words, I hear my Father's still small voice in my heart saying, "Really?  Do you REALLY want the healing?"  And I realize that is the issue.  I am still wavering about it.  James 1:6 says "But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering." But I realize I am indeed wavering.  I want the healing, but I don't want to make changes I know I need to make for it to occur.  I want the healing, but I'm afraid of changes in how people will relate to me when it occurs.  I'm of two minds about it.  I want healing now - but I'm not sure I do!  I'm in the exact boat that James was talking about, and of course I can't receive healing when I'm not even sure I want it!  Is this then the reason for continued prayer about something - for "badgering" God?  Is it that we need to continue to pray about a situation until all parts of ourselves line up in agreement about it?  In Matthew 18:19, Jesus promised that if two of us agree about anything we ask God for, it will be done.  But here I am, and I can't even get the one of me to agree! :)

Father, I DO want this healing!  I've tasted bits and pieces of it here and there, but I want the whole thing!  I want to be COMPLETELY healed - including a healing within about the way I think about it.  I want to be TOTALLY willing to make any change necessary, and I want to eagerly embrace your healing, regardless of what others around me might think, say, or do.  Father, I ask for willingness to change, for a clear understanding of the changes that must occur, and for the power to make those changes.  And I ask for your love to fill me and cast out any fear that I have associated with thoughts of healing.  And I intend to continue to ask for these things until all parts of me that are not in agreement have been brought to light and healed so that the full healing I seek can occur.  Thank you, Father, for your continued work in my life and for the promise that the work you have begun in me will be seen to completion!  I love you, Father!

Family Matters

Today I'm writing about something I never thought to journal about - all those "begats" in the Bible!  (You know, this person begat that person begat another person.)  I started reading this morning at the beginning of 1st Samuel:

"Now there was a certain man of Ramathaim Zophim, of the hill country of Ephraim, and his name was Elkanah, the son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite." (WEB)

Though in this case it used the phrase "the son of" rather than "begat",  I caught myself thinking "Here we go again.  All these begats.  Why waste time & space with this stuff instead of getting on with the story?"  Immediately the answer came.  "Roots.  Family history is important.  It's important to understand where you come from."  Of COURSE there's a REASON!  It's not wasted time or space!

In the past, when I've tried to gain some meaning from similar passages, I've done so by looking up the meanings of the names to see what that might tell me.  While that can be an interesting exercise that sometimes brings intriguing insights, it was something like focusing on the trees and missing the whole idea of the forest.  While there's something to be said for tree study, today was time for me to see the forest.

The reading of this passage and the focus on roots and family came to me in the context of a question I had been sitting with about time devoted to extended family.  It was as though God Himself was saying to me, "Cheryl, family history is important. Roots are important.  Think of all those passages about family heritage in the Bible.  You've wondered about them for so long, but totally missed the point.  Time was taken to list all of that heritage because it's IMPORTANT!"

I find myself wondering why.  Why is it important to note the family relationships with people that are no longer living or are more distant relations?  Why not focus on immediate family and those nearby?  Anyway, isn't the most important family history my adoption as a child of God?  These are questions I still sit with, but I know I don't need to know why. I just need to move forward as directed.  If the time comes when it is helpful for me to know why, I will be given those answers. They're not important before then.

Father, thank you for your guidance and your love.  May I fully understand and act on that which is important for me for now.  I trust you with that - and with the rest of it Father!  Thank you for the family I have.  Too many people have such challenging family relationships!  Father, thank you for bringing my daughter back to me and for the love you put in each member of my family.  Again today may I be filled with your love such that it overflows to each person I interact with.  I ask Your blessing on each family member and friend in a special way, Father.  Once again I thank you for all you do for each one of us.  Thank you for peace and joy and love.  I love you, Father.

For the Best

Today brings more gems from Psalms 119 - 

"Be good to your servant, God; be as good as your Word. Train me in good common sense; I'm thoroughly committed to living your way.  Before I learned to answer you, I wandered all over the place, but now I'm in step with your Word.  You are good, and the source of good; train me in your goodness.  The godless spread lies about me, but I focus my attention on what you are saying; They're bland as a bucket of lard, while I dance to the tune of your revelation.  My troubles turned out all for the best —  they forced me to learn from your textbook.  Truth from your mouth means more to me than striking it rich in a gold mine. (Psalms 119:65-72 - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.)

As I read the words, "Train me in good common sense;" I think of the saying, "common sense isn't common".  Clearly God's ways are NOT the common way of doing things - yet they are indeed the most sensible - they bring the best results by far. 

And I can relate to the idea of wandering all over the place.  My search for God was a lot like wandering in the wilderness.  I've had so many things I had to un-learn - so many of those foolish old tapes that have nothing to do with the reality of life with God!  I note that the Psalmist says this wandering occurred before he learned to answer God.  Hmmm, I always thought of it as being before I learned to listen to God.  Are there some things I need to answer Him with?  I think of Samuel's response - "Speak Lord, for thy servant heareth." Of course a response is required.  I need to respond "Yes, Lord"!  Father, may I follow you so well that I can truly say, "I'm in step with your Word"!

God is indeed good and the source of good - and I can be trained in His goodness! What a great reminder.  If ever I get discouraged and don't see a lot of good in my life, these are times to ask God to train me in His goodness!  And even when I think I see a lot of good, I need to continue to ask God to train me in His goodness because God doesn't see as man sees. We're told, "For the Lord sees not as man sees; for man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." (I Sam 16:7 - Amplified Bible).   Father, I want your goodness to be my guide.  I want to be trained in your goodness that I can be a channel for Your goodness in this world.  And I want to learn from you and remember to value as you do - to focus on the inner person, not outward appearances - whether looking at myself, or any other of your children.  Thank you, Father!

I've had many experiences of people spreading lies about me, and it's been painful. I'm sad to say that sometimes I've even allowed such experiences to make me fearful and cause me to be too cautious about stepping out and doing what God has called me to do.  I am reminded, "For you have now received not a spirit of slavery to put you once more in bondage to fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption in which we cry Abba, (Father)! Father!" (Romans 8:15 - Amplified Bible)  Clearly at these times, I need to turn the focus of my attention to what my Heavenly Father is saying to me, and I love the visual here of dancing to the tune of God's revelation!  This is indeed the truth of the matter.  When I keep my focus on God where it belongs, I can rest in the shelter of His arms and dance, instead of worrying about what gossips are saying about me!  I am so grateful!

I also have experienced the fact that "my troubles turned out all for the best" - or as Romans 8:28 puts it, "all things work together for good".  But I don't want to rely on trouble to cause me to learn from God's textbook! I want to enjoy dancing with Him everyday!  However, when trouble comes, I certainly want to remember that it will turn out all for the best, trust my Heavenly Father, and continue to seek His guidance.

Father, I am so grateful for your guidance!  I am ashamed when I see how easily the opinions of others and fear of their gossip can make me hesitant to follow your lead. Father, in the storms of life I want to ALWAYS keep my eyes on you! I think of our upcoming dance showcase and my fears of looking foolish as I dance with my husband - fears of making mistakes and of looking ungainly instead of graceful - and I realize I sometimes have similar fears when it comes to dancing with you, Father.  I fear I'll look foolish to those around me, that I'll cause us to look ungainly as I misinterpret your lead or forget to wait on you and instead step out on my own.  But, just like I haven't let those fears stop me from dancing with my husband, knowing that only practice will teach me to follow as I ought, I don't want to let such fears keep me from dancing with you Lord!  And I realize that just as in dancing with my husband, as long as I am on this earthly plane, there will be times when I make a misstep, and always more to learn - how to follow ever more fully, and how to execute ever more intricate steps! Thank you, Father, for your patience as I'm learning, and for your guidance. I DO value your guidance much more than all the gold in a goldmine.

God Will Fulfill His Purpose for Me!

When troubled or discouraged, I have often returned to a text found in Philippians: ". . . being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." (Phil 1:6 NIV) This text reminds me that no matter how slow my progress may seem, or how far from God I might feel at any given time, He IS working in me both to will and to do of His good pleasure (Phil 2:13).  This morning, I came across a similar promise in one of the Psalms:

"The Lord will fulfill [his purpose] for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever — do not abandon the works of your hands." (Ps 138:8 NIV)

I love reading the Psalms - especially those written by David as this one was.  David's walk with God was so REAL. David clearly wasn't perfect, but God called him a man after his own heart! (I Sam 13:14, Acts 13:22)  David was sometimes afraid or discouraged, and sometimes fell far short of what he should in his actions and faith, but He continued to look to God - the "author and finisher" (Heb 12:2) of his faith.  I love the verses that say that God saw David as a man who kept His commandments and and followed God with all his heart (for example, I Kings 14:8) - despite David's human failings. This verse from Psalms 138 is a great reminder.  David's words suggest a fear of abandonment, but a steadfast faith in God combating that fear.  This morning, I choose to take David's words as my own - with gratitude.

Father, I am so grateful that your love endures forever and you will not abandon me but will instead fulfill your purpose for me!  I am so grateful that you will carry your work to completion in me, as I, too, look to you as both the author and finisher of my faith.  I am grateful that you continue to work in me both to WILL and to DO of your good pleasure.  You know the current challenges in my path.  I trust you to remove them if it is the best way to fulfill your plan in my life - and to give me the courage and strength to continue moving forward despite these challenges if that is what you see is best.  I am grateful for your continued guidance in my life, and the strength you give each day! I love you, Father.