Yesterday was our first day back from a vacation focused on much needed rest and relaxation. Since it was Sunday, I continued my rest and relaxation to a large extent, but this morning as I awakened, I had my mind on the many things that needed to get done - things to do to take care of my spiritual health, things to do to take care of my physical health, things to do to take care of my home, things to do to perform the work-related tasks that were before me. . . . As I contemplated the many things I could do with my time, I recognized a bit of anxiety welling in me. So many things - so little time. What was the best use of my time? Where should I focus my energy?
As I lay awake talking to God about my to-do list, and visualizing the various tasks, I heard that still small voice whispering to me. "Cheryl, you are worried about many things. (Luke 10:41) I came that you might enjoy life and live abundantly. (John 10:10) In fact, the JOY of the Lord is your strength! (Nehemiah 8:10) It saddens me to see you so worried about what you should do. I've told you 'whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might as joyful service to me!' (Eccl 9:10, Col 3:23) And I've encouraged you to ask for wisdom, spoken of the perils of being double-minded, and explained the importance of living your life with "no wavering." (James 1:5-8) No matter what you would choose to do in your current mind-set, you would be anxious! But I want you to live a life of joy! (Phil 4:4)"
I was immediately convicted. I knew He was right. I had been allowing the spirit of worry to live through me no matter what decision I made about what I would do. But that wasn't the spirit I wanted within me! I want God's spirit of love and trust and joy within me - ALWAYS. Father, forgive me! Thank you for showing me what I was doing! Please cast out that spirit of worry and replace it with your perfect love, peace, and trust in you. Thank you, Father.
The picture that came to mind immediately after that realization and repentance was of the disciples in the boat on the lake - terrified of the waves that were being whipped up by the gale-force winds, while Jesus slept in the back of the boat. (Matthew 8:23-27, Mark 4:35-41, Luke 8:22-25) The picture was more compelling for me because we recently spent time on a lake in a kayak, dealing with waves that were by no means whipped by a gale, but were frightening enough for me since I haven't spent a lot of time in a kayak and hadn't expected to see any waves on the lake at all.
This story of the disciples facing the waves is FOR ME! And Jesus' words are also for me. To that anxious voice in my mind, Jesus says, "Peace, be still" and then asks me "Why are you so timid? How is it that you have no faith?" As I feel the calm settle over my soul and as I remember the truth that God is in charge and is working ALL THINGS for my good (Rom 8:28), I am SO grateful! Grateful for the reminder, grateful for the truth, grateful for the peace and joy that comes with remembering the truth.
Thank you, Father! I am so grateful that you are in charge of my life and that I can trust you. Father, please banish these pesky anxieties from my life. Instead, I choose to trust in your gift of faith and to trust you to give me the direction I need. Thank you that you are the loving God that you are! I'm so grateful to know that you want me to ENJOY life! How much better it is to trust you and perform the tasks you set before me with joy and praise instead of with worry! Indeed you have not given me a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind! (2Tim 1:7) Thank you, Father!!!
1 comment:
This was "for me," today also. Thank you for posting it!
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This blog is simply a sharing of my "daily bread" - my daily walk with God. If something I've said has touched your heart, or sparked a new thought, I'd love to hear from you.