About This Blog

The butterfly picture in the upper left corner is a symbol and reminder for me of the spiritual process. Sometimes I am the caterpillar - barely able to see far enough in front of me to put one foot in front of the other. Sometimes I find myself in that dark place of the soul, and I remind myself that it is simply my cocoon. While all may seem dark, and I may feel like everything is totally disintegrating around me (and in me!) a miracle is at work in my life and I will soon be able to fly! I love those days where I experience the butterfly in my life! The ability to fly above all the mundane earthy matters and remember the truth and experience God's power in tangible ways in my life are wonderful times indeed that occur more and more often as I continue this journey! Thank you, God!

If you are so inclined, I invite you to journey with me as we seek the promised land together. While I hope to share some "faithbooking" (scrapbook pages or artistic journaling about my faith journey), much of the time the journey may well be seen in words, rather than pictures. I invite you to create your own pictures. How do these things play out in your life? I'd love to hear from you about your own spiritual journey!

Saturday, November 30, 2013

Bless me, Father!

Some mornings when I take my devotional time, I feel like a feast has been set before me and I am SO spiritually fed I feel full to overflowing.  At other times, it is hard to feel that connection.  I can't say what makes the difference, but I have seen the power of Jacob's words when he wrestled with God the night before he was to meet Esau.  He said, "I will not let you go unless you bless me." - Genesis 32:26  NASU  

It can be tempting when I don't immediately recognize any spiritual food to just "leave the table" assuming it's just "not happening" today.  But Jesus taught us to pray "Give us this day our daily bread" (Matthew 6:11, Luke 11:3) and I have found that to be a powerful prayer - that applies to more than simply physical food.  It is a prayer I found myself praying once again this morning.

As I contemplated the story of Jacob, I was drawn to the blessing Jacob was given in response to his request.  He was asked what his "name" was and was given a new name.  In essence he was asked, what are you known for?  He had to reply "Jacob" - the supplanter or usurper. (Gen 32:28) He was told, "No longer - now you are to be known as 'Israel' one who has prevailed with God." 

What character traits do I have that need to be changed?  This is the blessing God seeks to give me today - to change my reputation!  One of the things I think of is that over the years I have sometimes had a reputation as a worrier.  This is a trait that I've seen God working in me to replace.  What a powerful and wonderful blessing if I come to be known as one with great faith instead of one who worries all the time!

Father, thank you for this blessing!  I know you are working in me to accomplish this!  Are there other such blessings I am to be recognizing at this time, Father?  I know another transformation you wish to bless me with is that I become known as generous and one who cares for others as much as myself, rather than selfish.  What a blessing, Father!  How wonderful to be able to be a blessing to others!  Father, as I move through my day this day, may these blessings be evident.  May my focus indeed be on you and others rather than on myself.  May I trust you fully rather than falling back into old habits of worrying about things.  Father, as I continue to contemplate my many blessings as this Thanksgiving season has reminded me to do, I see that the most amazing blessings of all are not the material blessings of food and shelter and clothing - though those are wonderful to have and I am so grateful for them.  The most amazing blessings are those changes you have made in me.  Increased faith and joy and generosity.  Father, I am SO grateful!

Thursday, November 28, 2013

The Least of These

This morning I awoke with thoughts of those who will be coming to my home for Thanksgiving Dinner, and the preparations that still needed to be completed.  I found myself praying for God's love to flow through me to those who would be in my home today, and that I would see all of them through His eyes and love them with His love. As I was thinking about this, a verse popped into my head: "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." Matthew 25:40 KJV 
Here is the full story - as translated in the NIV:
"When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. 
"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.' 
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?' 
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' 
"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.' 
"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'  
"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.' 
"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life."  Matthew 25:31-46
I grew up with the idea that what mattered most so far as God was concerned was what I BELIEVED.  Doctrinal issues seemed so important - that I understood God and the Bible CORRECTLY.  But these verses repeat the theme I saw in Isaiah 58.  The most important issue is how we treat others.  Jesus said it pretty succinctly "Love the Lord your God . . . and your neighbor as yourself."

These verses from Matthew, like the ones in Isaiah, indicate that what makes the difference is not our doctrinal beliefs, but whether or not we meet the needs of those less fortunate. I want to help, but frankly this description feels a bit overwhelming to me. Are there people that are hungry that I have not fed?  Thirsty to whom I have not given a drink?  Are there strangers that I did not invite in?  People who needed clothes that I did not clothe?  Are there those who are sick or in prison that I have not visited? How can I possibly live up to such an ideal?  Is such a way of life even safe?  As I think these thoughts, in the back of my mind I hear the little whisper, "Do you trust God or don't you?"  Once again, I cry with the father that came to see Jesus, "Lord, I believe.  Help thou mine unbelief!"

And then my Heavenly Father's words come to me through Paul's letter to the Philippians: "For it is God that worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure." (Philippians 2:13) I can't expect to do this on my own.  Only by God's grace can I be so self-less and caring for others.

As I re-read this verse this morning, I suddenly realize that it is followed immediately by another verse that I've been focused on lately: "Do everything without complaining or arguing." (Philippians 2:14  ISVSo, not only am I to live up to such an ideal, but I'm to do so without complaint or argument! 

Father, you know my heart. You know the selfishness that hides in it's corners.  I once again cry out for that clean heart you have promised.  Only you can create in me a person that is so filled with love that I can totally live the way you have described here, Father!  Father, on this day of gratitude, I find myself feeling very needy!  I feel so far from your ideal for me, and I want to do your will, Father!  Your promises come flooding into my mind.  Not only will you work in me to will and do, but you have promised to continue the work you have begun in me.  You have promised to give me a clean heart, to take away my stony one and give me one of flesh.  Thank you, Father.  I cling to your promises because I know it is only possible through you.  But that's another thing you've promised - nothing is impossible with you!  Father, thank you for your promises! Thank you for your love and gentle guidance!  Father, I ask for a special blessing this day that those that come to my home this day will see YOU.  Father, I also think of those who have chosen not to come or are unable to be here for one reason or another.  You know how my heart aches with longing to see them, and with the desire that those who have not already done so come to understand your love and open to it.  Father, I claim your promises here too, and am so grateful for them!  Psalms 115:14 and Acts 2:39 come to mind, and I thank you.  Father, you are so generous with me, how can I not also be generous with those around me?  Thank you, Father!

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Whatever Your Hand Finds To Do

This morning, Dr. Spurgeon's "Morning and Evening" devotional took me back to a verse that I've been guided to several times in recent months.  It is found in Ecclesiastes:
"Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might" (Ecclesiastes 9:10 NIV)
One of the challenges I can run into is a tendency to feel so overwhelmed with my "to do" list that it's hard to know what to do first.  Too often that means I spend too much time deciding what to do and not enough time actually doing it.  On the other hand, I can choose to do something on that list and then spend half of my energy worrying about whether it was the most important thing instead of focusing on completing that task!  

As I've looked for ways to be more efficient with my time, this verse has helped a lot.  I can pray and ask for guidance, and then start on the first thing that comes to mind, working at it diligently before moving on to the next thing.  It's surprising sometimes how much more I can accomplish when I don't spend so much time worrying about what should come first, and just get started! :)

Of course, I've found this requires some honesty on my part.  Sometimes I know exactly what should come first, but don't want to do it!  Sometimes I have an agenda of my own about what I WANT to do, and need to be willing to set that aside and honestly seek my Father's guidance as to the best use of my time.  During the holiday season, it seems that my to do list is extra long with fewer hours in my day.  Under these circumstances, this advice is undoubtedly even more important.

Father, thank you for so many blessings in my life!  Life, health, strength, wisdom, guidance, friends, family, food, shelter, opportunities. This morning, I once again thank you for the gentleness of your leading, and for the guidance you give.  As I go about my day, may your will be done through my thoughts and actions.  Thank you for the promise that you work in me to will and to do of your good pleasure! (Phil 2:3)  I love you, Father!

Sunday, November 24, 2013

No Arguing Either?

"Do everything without complaining or arguing" Philippians 2:14 NIV

This morning I was brought back to this verse, and realized not only do I complain at times, but sometimes I even argue.  Yesterday I had the unpleasant experience of arguing with my spouse.   Fortunately that is not a common occurrence, and we fairly quickly caught ourselves and made up, but it was still unpleasant in the moment. It once again showed me how easily I can fall into behavior that I really want to avoid. It just takes a short moment of focusing on myself and taking my eyes off my Heavenly Father and Guide.  

With this reminder from Philippians ringing in my ears, I decided to see what else the Bible had to say on the subject.  Here are some of the verses that caught my eye:
  • "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." James 1:19-20 NIV
  • "But if you have bitter jealousy and rivalry in your hearts, stop boasting and slandering the truth. That kind of wisdom does not come from above. No, it is worldly, self-centered, and demonic. For wherever jealousy and rivalry exist, there is disorder and every kind of evil. However, the wisdom that comes from above is first of all pure, then peace-loving, gentle, willing to yield, full of compassion and good deeds, and without a trace of partiality or hypocrisy. And a harvest of righteousness is grown from the seed of peace planted by peacemakers." James 3:14-18 ISV
  • "Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, quarreling, and slander be put away from you, along with all hatred. And be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another just as God has forgiven you in the Messiah." Ephesians 4:31-32 ISV
  • "Pursue peace with everyone, as well as holiness, without which no one will see the Lord." Hebrews 12:14-15 ISV  
  • "Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." Matthew 5:9 KJV
Father, thank you for your guidance this day.  So much for me to think about!  I want to be quicker to listen - to you and to those around me.  I want to be slow to give advice and slow to become angry.  I want to focus on the wisdom that comes from you - wisdom that is pure, peace-loving, gentle, willing to yield, and full of compassion and good deeds.  I choose to be kind to others, compassionate and forgiving and to pursue peace with everyone. Father, I want to be known as your child!  I know only in you is it possible to consistently make these choices.  Only by keeping my eyes off myself and on YOU can I live this way on a day in, day out, basis.  When I remember your promises - that you "keep everything running right", that with you "all things work together for good", and that you have "set before me an open door that no one can shut", there is no reason to argue about anything.  As I remember that you are in charge, I can indeed pursue peace with everyone.  Thank you for your continued work in me to "will and to do of your good pleasure", Father!  Thank you for your loving guidance, for your gentle reproof, and for your example. May I do your will always.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Without what???

"Do everything without complaining or arguing" Philippians 2:14 NIV

Well, I caught myself at it again this morning.  Why does complaining come so easily when I have so much to be grateful for?  It seems like such a tall order - "Do everything without complaining or arguing".  It sure can't be said more clearly than that!  I was brought to this idea back in October (see post here).  I used to be so judgmental of the Israelites for complaining to Moses all the time after the miracle of their deliverance, but I've been forced to see that I am no better.  And Paul makes it clear this is a serious issue (I Cor 10:10).  

I am so grateful for our Thanksgiving Holiday because it serves as a reminder to me of what is best for me to focus on.  Thankfulness and gratitude serve me much better than complaints ever could!  And complaints are evidence that I don't fully trust that my Heavenly Father is indeed keeping "everything running right" (Ps 119:164), and that He is ensuring that "all things work together for good" (Rom 8:28). I KNOW God can be trusted, so this morning once again I choose gratitude and trust.

Father, I AM grateful.  I DO know that all things work together for good as you have said!  Please forgive my complaints and create in me that clean heart that is so filled with love and gratitude that there is no room for anything else.  You have given me so many blessings!  As I've seen so many of my dance friends struggle with injuries, I have been reminded of the healing you have so generously given as I remember my own struggles with injuries in the past.  As I've paused to think about those people who have been a blessing in my life this year, I've been reminded of how grateful I am to be surrounded with the friends you've given.  I can remember a time when I felt that I had no friends.  Father, the list goes on and on.  You are so generous and have given me so much.  You've shown me over and over that your timing is best and that you indeed "keep everything running right".  Forgive me for forgetting that!  Please renew that right spirit within me that I may live immersed in an attitude of gratitude.  Thank you, Father, for all your gifts to me this day and every day!

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Thankful!

As Thanksgiving time draws near, I once again realize how much I have for which to be thankful.  Top of that list is my Heavenly Father.  He is so loving, so forgiving, so gentle in His leading, so willing to guide and support!  Thank you, Father, thank you!

I think about the air I breath, the water I drink, the food I eat - and my body that knows how to process all of that to keep me alive.  Truly I am "wonderfully made" (Psalms 139:14).  The way my body functions - even the way it works to heal when something goes wrong - all are gifts from my heavenly Father. Thank you, Father, thank you!

I have shelter from the storms of life - the physical ones as well as the emotional and spiritual ones!  A warm home, friends who care, and most of all a God who is INDEED "my refuge and strength" (Ps 46:1). Thank you, Father, thank you!

As I've started this new job, He has seen me through time and time again. He has sent so many people to aid and guide me!  I am so grateful for such supportive friends, and for the way He has impressed them to step forward just when I needed them.  He's given me strength and courage when I needed it.  He's given me guidance.  And He's opened many doors. Thank you, Father, thank you! 

I am so grateful for friends and family!  The old Swedish proverb really is true, "Shared joy is a double joy, shared sorrow half".  And I am so grateful to have friends and family with whom to share my life!  They help me keep things in perspective, help me see things from other viewpoints, and fill my life with love.  Thank you, Father, thank you!

Father, this morning I again lift my praise to you.  You are indeed a mighty fortress, a loving Father, and a gentle guide.  I am so grateful!

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Today I Will Choose to Be Happy!

A few days ago I mentioned listening to an interview with Andy Andrews. That interview made such an impact that I went to my on-line library to see if it had any of his books.  I found "The Traveler's Gift" as an audio book and I've enjoyed listening to it as I go about my tasks.  What he calls the "Fifth Decision for Success" really struck me because it covers a topic I've been being brought to over and over again in my Bible studies recently.  This fifth decision for success is "I will choose to be happy."  

I have often seen in my life that when I am receptive to something God wants to teach me, that I find information abounding, but this has gone beyond what I've seen before.  In the same day I listened to this book I read someone's blog post that also talked about what God's been working to teach me!  This particular book by Andy Andrews has really given me food for thought about HOW to choose to be happy.  One of the things it suggests is that within moments of awakening I laugh for 7 seconds.  It claims it has a physiologic affect that promotes joy.  I've already seen that laughing at a joke can make a real difference as I go about the tasks God has set before me, so I can certainly believe it.  Yet I find myself hesitant to do this.  I don't want to be seen as foolish by my husband - even though I KNOW he would be accepting of my doing it!  Am I going to let pride interfere with the guidance God is sending my way regarding this topic?  

Other things that strike me as I read his "5th Decision" are these ideas:
  • "People are drawn to me because I have laughter in my heart."  A week or two ago I wrote about the need to be in joy as I interact with others - especially in my new job.  This is one of the reasons it is so important!
  • "I will smile at every person I meet. . . . it is . . . the most potent weapon I possess."  I guess I would prefer the word "tool" to "weapon" here, but I get the idea - a smile is powerful. Wow!  Not long ago I wrote about discouragement, and he goes on to say that a smile will wither away any discouragement!  
  • Next he talks about cultivating a grateful spirit and how that also chases away discouragement.  This, of course, is something I've already been led to and have been blogging about, but one of the ways he said it really stood out to me. "It is impossible for the seeds of depression to take root in a thankful heart."
So, today, with Thanksgiving Day just around the corner, I find these ideas taking root in my heart in a way they have never done before.  For several years I have chosen to send out "Thanksgiving Cards" to some of those who have had an impact on my life during the year, thanking them for what and who they are in my life.  Today I see this task as even more important as I seek to incorporate God's instructions in my life - to "in everything give thanks" (1 Thes 5:18) and to "rejoice in the Lord always" (Phil 4:4).  Cultivating a joyful and grateful spirit is SO important!

Father, this morning I'm so grateful.  You are a wonderful teacher to me, sending just the information I need to hear when I need to hear it.  You've shown me that your joy is my strength (Neh 8:10) and that no matter what is going on in my life I can choose to be joyful because after all, "Nothing shall be impossible" with you (Luke 1:37)!  Father, this morning I DO make the choice to be happy.  You have given me so much!  Life, health, strength, joy, forgiveness are just the beginning of your gifts.  Father, thank you for the open door you have set before me and the willingness and strength you give me to walk through it!  Thank you for sleep and for joy!  Thank you for your presence in my life for truly "in your presence is fullness of joy" (Ps 16:11)!  Thank you, Father!

Saturday, November 16, 2013

All or Nothing

This morning, the words of a song come to mind.  I think they're from the musical "Oklahoma!".  They go like this:
 "With me, it's all or nothin'.  Is it all or nothin' with you?"
I'm discovering in life that sometimes this is the attitude that I need to be taking - like in my relationship with God - but at other times, this attitude REALLY gets in my way!  I'm the type of person that always brings a lot of focus to my activities - often blocking out everything else while I pursue whatever is before me.  While this approach can help me avoid distractions, sometimes those "distractions" are put there for a reason.  Sometimes they are God-inspired.  

One example of this is my new job.  There is so much to do, and my temptation is to put all of my time and effort into it. I've learned to put spending time with God first in my day, but after that I am tempted to do nothing else - not even take time to eat in a healthy way!  God reminds me that this is the attitude that robs me of the joy that he intends for me.  He's given me other interests, and I do not need to focus on one to the exclusion of all else!  I think of this verse from Ecclesiastes:
"In the morning sow thy seed, and in the evening withhold not thine hand: for thou knowest not whether shall prosper, either this or that, or whether they both shall be alike good." Ecclesiastes 11:6 KJV
To me, that sounds very much like advice to not put everything into one basket - to be diligent, but to diversify my labor. I'm learning to do this, and it is part of what keeps joy in my heart.  Focusing on one thing to the exclusion of all else soon turns what I am doing into drudgery, no matter how much I may have enjoyed it in the beginning.  But when I diversify, I find more joy in all that I do!

Part of the challenge for me is that I can sometimes have difficulty finishing what I start so I've learned to keep going until something is finished.  If I stop, I might not get back to it!  This attitude, however, is just not realistic in many situations. To lead a balanced life, I HAVE to take time for other things as well!  I'm BEGINNING to learn how to do this in a way that works; to set aside time for certain things to ensure I make progress in more than one area.  As I learn this, I feel more of that "joy of the Lord" that is my strength. 

Father, thank you for helping me to see and understand more about what has been sapping my joy.  Thank you for the blessing of multiple interests and things to do!  Instead of feeling overwhelmed at all the directions I need to go, thank you for helping me see them as multiple paths designed to keep me from losing that sense of joy!  Thank you for the joy in my heart, and for the blessing of courage instead of discouragement. Thank you that you will continue to guide me and help me understand better how to diversify my time and attention.  May I be able to discern those times and places where "all or nothing" is required, and to also clearly see when that is NOT the best approach.  And thank you for the people you have placed in my life that help keep me from becoming too focused on one thing!  Father, I am so grateful for your guidance, your love, and your joy in my life!

Friday, November 15, 2013

Wherever I Go

The verse that jumped out at me this morning was this one from Joshua:
"Haven't I commanded you? Strength! Courage! Don't be timid; don't get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take." (Joshua 1:9 from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.)
I've always thought the opposite of courage was fear, but this morning, that word "discouraged" jumped out at me. Surely that is another word that is the opposite of courage!  For some reason, I've not thought of being discouraged as having a lack of courage before, but this morning I find myself pondering that idea with interest. It has the feeling of an insight designed to free me from those bouts of discouragement that I experience from time to time!

When I am afraid, I've learned to look to God for courage, reminding myself that He is there with me every step of the way.  When I've been discouraged, however, I've just wanted to feel better.  I haven't always had a clearer goal than that.  All of a sudden as I read this verse, I realize that I can face discouragement the same way I've learned to face fear! I can look to God for courage, reminding myself that He is there with me every step of the way!

As I think about this more deeply, I realize that there is indeed often a relationship between discouragement and fear.  Much of the time when I am discouraged, there is really fear at the base of that discouragement - fear that I can't accomplish something I want or need to accomplish.  The courage needed at a time like this may not be the "flashy" sort of bravery that other situations call for, but it is courage just the same.  In fact sometimes, it takes more courage to face the day in and day out challenges, than something more overtly challenging.  I think of a quote I came across that I find myself thinking about from time to time.  It goes like this:
"Courage doesn't always roar.  Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.'" - Mary Anne Radmacher
Father, this morning I once again seek your courage and strength, to see me through this day.  I realize when I am discouraged, that lack of courage keeps me from experiencing the joy in you that is my strength (Nehemiah 8:10).  I forget to praise you, and start to worry instead.  Father this morning I want to praise you!  I am SO grateful for the opportunities you have placed before me - those open doors "that no one can shut" (Rev 3:8).  Forgive me for sometimes taking my eyes off of you and starting to sink in the overwhelming waves of preparation and duty.  I KNOW that your joy is indeed my strength and I look to you again this morning to fill my heart so full of the joy only you can give, that there is no room for fear or discouragement.  Father, I know that as I yoke with you, I indeed find that it is easy, and the burden is light (Matthew 11:30). And I thank you for that.  And Father, as this season of Thanksgiving draws near, I am so VERY grateful for the many gifts you give each day - and especially this morning for the gift of caring and supportive friends and family.  I love you, Father!

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Stories

This morning I am thinking about stories.  Sometimes I enjoy research, but other times, I simply want to hear or read stories.  Today is a story day.  My brain is tired and wants to rest and research just feels too daunting.  But a story - that feels relaxing.  Even if I know there is a point to the story that I need to seek out, I know I don't have to "get it" all right away.  I can take my time and ponder the story.

These thoughts came as I listened to an interview with Andy Andrews.  As he talked about his choice to write stories with a message rather than "How To" books.  I realized how right he was.  They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and what is a story, except a picture in words?  

This morning I am grateful for those who write meaningful stories that can both entertain me and cause me to think about and understand great truths.  And I realize that this was one of the gifts Jesus brought.  We are told: "Jesus used stories to tell all these things to the people; he always used stories to teach them." Matthew 13:34 NCV  

Why did he always use stories or parables?  The disciples actually asked Him this question.  What was His answer? This is the way the Message Bible puts it:
He replied, "You've been given insight into God's kingdom. You know how it works. Not everybody has this gift, this insight; it hasn't been given to them. Whenever someone has a ready heart for this, the insights and understandings flow freely. But if there is no readiness, any trace of receptivity soon disappears. That's why I tell stories: to create readiness, to nudge the people toward receptive insight. In their present state they can stare till doomsday and not see it, listen till they're blue in the face and not get it. I don't want Isaiah's forecast repeated all over again:
Your ears are open but you don't hear a thing.
Your eyes are awake but you don't see a thing.
The people are blockheads!
They stick their fingers in their ears
so they won't have to listen;
They screw their eyes shut
so they won't have to look,
so they won't have to deal with me face-to-face
and let me heal them.
"But you have God-blessed eyes — eyes that see! And God-blessed ears — ears that hear!  A lot of people, prophets and humble believers among them, would have given anything to see what you are seeing, to hear what you are hearing, but never had the chance.  (Matthew 13:11-17 from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.)
How am I doing this morning?  Am I one of those with ears open that doesn't hear a thing?  Are my eyes awake without seeing anything?  Do I stick my fingers in my ears so I don't have to listen or screw my eyes shut to avoid seeing what is before me? Sometimes I think I do.  Sometimes I just want to escape into anything that will keep me from dealing with what is in front of me.  Books, computer games, phone calls, shopping, food, even work can be a way to escape. But why would I choose escape when I could have healing instead? How would my life change if I made the choice to remove my fingers from my ears and open my eyes?  

Father, this morning I once again seek your will in my life.  I want to hear your voice, understand it, and obey.  I know how easily I can turn to various "escapes" when I feel overwhelmed by the tasks you have placed before me, but I know that is only because I have forgotten the truth.  Your yoke is easy and your burden is light! (Matt 11:30) I don't have to do all this on my own!  I am yoked together with you and you pull a lot of the load yourself!  As I think about this I flash on the picture of how different it is to do a challenging job when working WITH someone than when by myself.  Father, how often do I forget that You are working WITH me?  I am NOT alone!  Thank you, Father, for your promise that you continue to work in me both to will and to do of your good pleasure.  Father, today, may I indeed be one of those with "God-blessed eyes" and "God-blessed ears" that I may see, hear, and understand your will for me - and open to your power in my life to accomplish that.  Thank you, Father!

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Comfort & Truth

"And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you." John 14:16-17 KJV
This morning I was really struck by these words.  Our "Comforter" is the "Spirit of truth" which the world cannot receive because it doesn't see or know him, but he dwells in us.  Most of my life I've valued honesty and marveled at the way so many of those around me played fast and loose with the truth. In fact, in the world sometimes you're seen as naive and foolish if you DON'T do things like cheat on your taxes. Nevertheless, sometimes I've caught myself "stretching the truth" or being tempted to do so.  Never before have I been so struck with the value of honesty as when I read this verse.  The Spirit of Truth is to be my COMFORT!

Pilate's question to Jesus comes to mind (John 8:38):  "What is truth?"  And it strikes me that if I don't always find the truth comfortable and comforting, perhaps I've not seen the real truth.  I think back to yesterday's blog about Lazarus and Jesus' words that the end result was not death.  That was the REAL truth, though what APPEARED to be true was that Lazarus died!

Jesus words come back to me, "Let not your hearts be troubled, you believe in God, believe also in me."  How often do my troubles and challenges in life come because I let my heart be troubled instead of believing?  How often do I forget that God has promised "ALL things work together for good"?  When I see what appears to be death or illness in my life, whether literal or figurative, do I believe in that "death" or do I believe in the eternal life I've been promised? And if I'm having trouble believing in God's goodness in the midst of my current surroundings, what can I do about it?

It strikes me that the most important thing is faith.  Do I believe in the power of Jesus' prayers?  He said HE was going to pray that the Comforter be sent to me!  Surely HIS prayers have been answered!

Another verse comes to mind, "We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death." 1 John 3:14 NIV  Do I love those around me?  Some of them are challenging to love!  Their behavior makes me uncomfortable.  Am I willing to remember the truth that they are God's children, and love them, no matter how they appear?  According to this verse, this is the training I need to ensure that I do not "remain in death" (focused on those things that appear negative in my life and believing them to be real).  Allowing God to fill me with His love allows me to begin to see as He sees and to accept the truth of eternal life in my own experience.

Father, once again I cry with that Father that came to Jesus, "Lord, I believe, help thou mine unbelief."  Thank you for the promise of the Spirit of truth in my life, and may I accept that spirit fully.  Thank you, Father, for your love and care!  Thank you for your many gifts! May your love so fill me that I see all of life through YOUR eyes.  Thank you, Father!  May Your will be done in my life this day.  Father, you know the challenges I face today.  Please give me the vision to see the TRUTH.  May the Spirit of Truth guide my thoughts and actions this day, I pray!  I look forward to seeing mighty miracles as you "raise the dead" in my life this day!  Thank you, my Father!

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Eyes hath not seen

One of the things I've been pondering in recent weeks is the way Jesus taught us to pray.  This morning my thoughts go to the prayer He prayed in front of Lazarus' tomb.  "Father, I thank you for hearing me. I know that you always hear me, but I have said this for the sake of the crowd standing here, so that they may believe that you sent me.” (John 11:41-42 ISV) Jesus thanked God for hearing Him BEFORE He saw the answered prayer.  In this case it was a very serious issue - death! 

In my experience it's not always easy to thank God in the midst of what looks like death - whether we're talking physical death, death of a dream - or even just the postponing of a dream! In Philippians, Paul reminds us to "in every situation let your petitions be made known to God through prayers and requests, with thanksgiving."  (Philippians 4:6-7 ISV)   Can I truly make my petitions known to God with THANKSGIVING in all things?  Only with God as my strength and shield can that possibly happen!

The whole story of Lazarus is a thought provoking one.  Jesus had told the disciples that Lazarus' sickness would not end in death - and then he died!  What were the disciples to think?  Clearly they all believed the evidence of their eyes rather than the words that Jesus had spoken. And given what I see in the way I live my own life, I suspect I would have done the same.  And yet Jesus had spoken the TRUTH!  Lazarus was RAISED from the dead!  Am I willing to trust my Heavenly Father enough that I believe what He tells me rather than what I see with my own two eyes? 

There are lots of things to think about as I think about this story, but in particular this morning, it is a reminder to me that I am to make all of my petitions known to God with THANKSGIVING.  As the Thanksgiving holiday nears, it seems like an excellent time to focus on this.  I have always used this holiday as a reminder to be grateful, and in recent years to thank various people in my life for the blessing they are in my life.  This year I want to take it this step farther and remember even in my petitions to God to present them with thanksgiving.

Father, thank you for this reminder!  I've seen in my life the difference it makes when I choose gratitude no matter what has crossed my path.  It's so easy for me to forget that you are in control, but choosing gratitude requires me to remember that or I CAN'T make the gratitude choice!  So, this morning, Father I once again choose gratitude.  I ask your forgiveness for the "murmuring" I've done about the circumstances in which I find myself.  I KNOW you are in charge, so these circumstances are for my good and I thank you.  Thank you for the opportunities before me.  And thank you for the strength and wisdom I know you are giving me so that with You in me I can meet the challenges I face.  You are an amazing God, and I am grateful.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Strength and Joy

I've been thinking about JOY much of this week.  What a difference it makes when we are full of joy!  Life just flows so much better, no matter what our tasks.  A verse that came to mind this morning is this one found in Nehemiah: "the joy of the Lord is your strength" (Nehemiah 8:10 KJV) 

I have certainly seen that to be true for me this week.  The moment I let go of the worry and asked God to fill my heart with joy instead, I felt an influx of energy!  Where I had been so discouraged I didn't know how I could keep putting myself out there, I now felt energized and ready to face the tasks of the day.  

The story surrounding the words in the text quoted above is an interesting one - and quite instructive.  If one is facing a daunting task, there is much to glean in this story about how to go about it.  The bottom line, however, is that we need to look to God for guidance and keep focused on our tasks, no matter who tries to distract us.  

As the story starts, at the beginning of this book, Nehemiah is the "cup bearer" for the king - the one responsible to test the king's food and wine and make sure it hasn't been poisoned.  He has recently received news about Jerusalem and how those who have returned to it from captivity are faring.  The news wasn't good.  The city was in ruins, and the people discouraged.  Nehemiah felt a real burden to do something about it, so prayed to God and prepared to talk to the king.  

An opportunity was presented pretty quickly, as the king noticed that Nehemiah was not his normal cheerful self and asked about it. When he heard the tale, the king asked Nehemiah what he wanted.  Nehemiah prayed for wisdom and then told the king he would like to be sent to rebuild the city.  As the king asked for more details about what would be needed.  Nehemiah told him how long he expected it to take, and when the king agreed to let him go, asked for letters of authorization for safe passage, and for access to the supplies needed to rebuild the city.   The king did more than that, sending some of his army to accompany Nehemiah.  

Nehemiah and the people working with him faced many challenges from outsiders as well as their own people, but they continued the work to rebuild the city.  All in all, Nehemiah was there working and overseeing things for 12 years, but the wall itself was completed in 52 days despite challenges and threats of all kinds.

Seven months later, the Israelites assembled near the site of the temple and Ezra began to read to them from the book of God's law.  There was a lot of weeping as the Israelites realized how far they had strayed.  That is when Nehemiah, Ezra, and all the priests, urged the people to put aside their weeping and embrace joy.  
"Because all the people were weeping as they listened to the words of the Law, Nehemiah the governor, Ezra the priest and scribe, and the descendants of Levi who taught the people told everyone, “This day is holy to the Lord your God. Do not mourn or weep.”  He also told them, “Go eat the best food, drink the best wine, and give something to those who have nothing, since this day is holy to our Lord. Don’t be sorrowful, because the joy of the Lord is your strength.” The descendants of Levi also calmed all the people by saying, “Be still, for the day is holy. Don’t be sorrowful!” So all the people went to eat, to drink, to send something to those who had nothing, and to celebrate with great joy, because they understood the words that were being declared to them."  (Neh 8:9-12 ISV)
Even when we realize we've made mistakes, we are to rejoice!  Recognizing our mistakes and moving forward is a cause for rejoicing, not weeping!  There are so many passages in the Bible that tell us to rejoice.  Here is another one:
"Let all those who take refuge in you rejoice!  Let them shout for joy forever, and may you protect them. Let those who love your name exult in you. Indeed, you will bless the righteous one, LORD, like a large shield, you will surround him with favor." (Psalms 5:11-12 ISV)
This morning, Father, I am so grateful for the joy you have put in my heart!  As I face the challenges that this day brings, may I face them with joy.  Father, please help me keep my mind fixed on you, remembering your power and strength and that your perfect love casts out fear. May I be so filled with your love and your joy that there is no room for anything else.  Thank you, Father, for the strength your joy gives me.  I love you, Father! Amen.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

JOY

Yesterday, I FINALLY heard the message God has been trying to give me for several days if not longer.  The last several times I've put myself out there publicly, in the course of my new job, there has been at least one person that has asked me, "Are you enjoying what you're doing?"  It took several repetitions of that question (word for word from different people) for me to finally realize it was really God's voice asking me that question through them, reminding me of an important instruction we are given in Philippians: "Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice." (Philippians 4:4 KJV)

As I've shared previously, I've been struggling with feeling I haven't always done as good a job as I would have liked.  That in turn turned into fear that I wouldn't do so, and a vicious cycle started where fear kept me from doing as good a job as I ordinarily would have done.  I've been obedient to move forward as God directs, despite my fear - leaning on His strength - but my attitude has not been particularly joy-filled.  I've been VERY serious as I've tried to do my best (and too often failed to do so!).  Yesterday, I finally "got it".  I am to be doing this with JOY!!!!  

I've had plenty of experience to know that it's possible to "try too hard" and get in our own way.  My husband and I have done that with dance as we've worked to learn new steps.  And we've physically seen the difference it makes when we relax and try the move without all the tension we create when we "try too hard".  But what does it mean to try too hard?  Today I see that at least part of it is that when we try too hard, we have let go of the joy and become too serious.  So, today I pray with the Psalmist: 
"Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and let a willing attitude control me." (Psalms 51:12 ISV)
That word "salvation" is one of those words that is used so often in religious circles that it's meaning has been obscured - at least for me.  As I looked up the word in it's original language in Strong's concordance, this is what I found it to mean "liberty, deliverance, prosperity".  I'm told it's from a primative root meaning "to be open, wide or free, i.e. (by implication) to be safe".  Liberty, deliverance, prosperity, to be open and free, to be safe.  What a wonderful thing!  And certainly joy producing.

It's all well and good to talk about rejoicing and living in joy instead of being so serious all the time, but how do I get there?  I'm naturally a pretty serious person.  As I ask my Father and Guide these questions, I remember my Toastmaster's training.  As a part of each meeting, the call went out to ask whether anyone had anything to share "for the good of the order".  What this question really meant was, "Who has a joke to share?"  A joke, assuming it's clean and not mean in nature, has a wonderful power to relieve tension and help folks relax and feel joy instead of trying too hard.  The thought comes that sharing a joke will not only help me relax, but my students as well!  A win-win for both of us.  An interesting thought, and I suddenly feel much lighter and relaxed as I think about my next opportunity to step out in faith and do what I've been lead to do! 

Thank you, Father!  Indeed your yoke is easy and your burden is light.  Thank you for lifting my burdens as I yoke (and joke!) with you!  Thank you for the reminder that while I am to do what you give me to do with my might, that doesn't mean I have to lose my joy in the process!  Thank you for your many blessings to me, my Father, and for the liberty, deliverance, prosperity, freedom, and safety that is your gift to me.  Thank you for your guidance and direction in my life.  I once again seek your will this day, my Father.  May you continue to work in me both to will and to do of your good pleasure - and to turn my weeping into joy as you've promised!  The words of a song come to mind:

Joy, joy, my heart is full of joy,
Joy, joy, my heart is full of joy,
Because my Savior watches over me,
That's the reason that my heart is full of joy!

Thank you, Father! Thank you!

Monday, November 4, 2013

Weakness

This morning I woke up battling discouragement.  It is so easy to read and agree with God's advice to "rejoice in the Lord always" and to "in everything give thanks", but it is not always so easy to DO.  When I've prayed that God's will be done in a situation and then it feels like it didn't go well, it's easy to forget that God's eyes see more than human eyes do and that "all things work together for good".

I am still dealing with issues of perfectionism and the challenges of messing up in a public way.  And no, things did not go perfectly yesterday from a human perspective.  I believe my prayers were indeed heard and that all was indeed perfect no matter what it looks like to human eyes. Yet it is not easy to rejoice when I feel public humiliation!  My inclination is to bury my head in my pillow and never leave the house again!  Yet, this morning, once again, God spoke to me as I cried out to Him.  This morning He reminds me, "my strength is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)  If I want to have God's strength in my life, I have to be willing to exhibit weakness!  Wow, that's so hard for me.  Clearly pride has more of a hold on my life than I realized!  Looking at the context of this verse, I realize that Paul experienced similar struggles.  He says:
"Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away. Each time he said, "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That's why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (New Living Translation)
What a concept! When I am weak, then I am strong!  It's hard to wrap my head around that, but I know it is true.  I hear the ring of authenticity in Paul's words and realize that I am in training.  When I can truly take pleasure in ALL circumstances, I know I will be much closer to living the life God intends for me.  When I can truly give thanks and rejoice in EVERYTHING, I will be a living example of that mustard seed of faith having grown into a full tree.  

So, Father, I once again "stop and shout praises for the way you keep everything running right".  I am reminded to trust that "all things work together for good"and that You who have "begun a good work" in me will see it to completion" and that You do "all things well".  Thank you, Father, for this "open door" that you have set before me, and for the many promises you continue to shower on me as I "wrestle not against flesh & blood, but against principalities"!  These principles are not easy and too often I struggle to put them into practice.  Being thankful and joy-filled in ALL circumstances is such a "new song" for me to learn to sing! I am grateful for your "music lessons", Father!  The words of a song come to mind: 
"He keeps me singing a happy song
He keeps me singing it all day long.
Although the days may be drear, He always is near,
And that's why my heart is always filled with song;
I'm singing, singing, all day long."
Thank you, Father, for those words to carry with me as I move through my day.  Please guide my thoughts and actions that they may be in alignment with your will!  Thank you, Father!

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Tears

This morning when I awoke, my song of praise, though there, was feeble.  I was feeling under the weather physically and mentally, and my tasks for the day seemed overwhelming.  As I came into my study for my morning devotionals, I was praying to God, thanking Him for the miracles performed so far in my life, and pleading for another to move me past the way I was feeling.  The pain in my body and my thoughts combined to bring tears to my eyes as I prayed - not knowing really what I prayed for, but knowing I needed God more than ever. As I sat at my computer to read the Bible from my Bible software, my eyes lit on these words:
"Prayers are instantly noticed in heaven. The moment Saul began to pray the Lord heard him. Here is comfort for the distressed but praying soul. Oftentimes a poor broken-hearted one bends his knee, but can only utter his wailing in the language of sighs and tears; yet that groan has made all the harps of heaven thrill with music; that tear has been caught by God and treasured in the lachrymatory of heaven. "Thou puttest my tears into thy bottle," implies that they are caught as they flow. The suppliant, whose fears prevent his words, will be well understood by the Most High. He may only look up with misty eye; but "prayer is the falling of a tear."
It felt like God was speaking directly to me saying, "I see and understand your tears. I am here, don't be afraid." Yesterday I had been reminded about how the Spirit intercedes for us when we don't know how to pray, and these words were reinforcements. This passage comes from Dr. Charles Spurgeon's Morning and Evening devotional and refers to Acts 9:11 which reads: "So the Lord said to him, "Arise and go to the street called Straight, and inquire at the house of Judas for one called Saul of Tarsus, for behold, he is praying. (NKJV, emphasis mine)

Father, I am so grateful for your love and guidance!  How would I survive without you?  Forgive me for the lack of faith I demonstrated as I put myself down for the job I've been doing when I've sought your will and done my best.  I choose to trust you, Father!  "Lord, I believe, help thou mine unbelief."  Father you have promised to continue the work you have begun in me and I know these opportunities were your doing.  Please take away all doubts and fears and leave only trust in you.

Knowing that perfectionism can really get to me and cause me distress when I don't meet the high standards I set for myself, I started looking to see what my concordance brought up on a search for the word "perfect".  I frankly expected something like "only God is perfect", but instead, this is what jumped out at me:
"It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect." (2 Samuel 22:33 NIV)
What an amazing God!  He knows I'm worried about really messing up publicly this week like I did last week.  It's so hard to go back to the "scene of the crime" and try again.  But I claim this promise today.

Father, thank you so much for this promised strength and perfection!  Please take my worried thoughts from my mind and fully replace them with your love, your power, and your peace. Please keep my mind focused on YOUR perfection.  May I KNOW and REMEMBER that your perfect will is being worked out in my life today - no matter what happens! Thank you, Father, for your blessings this morning, and each day of my life!  I am so grateful, and overwhelmed by your goodness to me.  Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Friday, November 1, 2013

For Today

This morning I find myself feeling rather overwhelmed.  I have several decisions to make and I just really don't know what to do about several things.  As I turned to God this morning, I didn't even know how to put it all into words - I just knew I need the guidance that only He can give.  In that context, these words from the Lord's prayer struck me in a slightly different way than they have before:
"Give us today our daily bread" (Matthew 6:11, ISV)
As I read these words once again, they seemed to speak of more than food for body and soul, but to any needs I might have for the day.  And I remember that this really is a hidden promise, reminding me that God does indeed supply all my needs. As it says in Philippians:
"And my God will fully supply your every need according to his glorious riches in the Messiah Jesus." Philippians 4:19 ISV
My needs this morning are not physical in nature, but I trust my Heavenly Father to supply them.  I don't know what I need this morning, but my Heavenly Father does and will meet the need.  Another verse comes to mind as I ponder all this:
"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." (Romans 8:26  NIV)
This is certainly the way I'm feeling.  I don't know what I need to pray for, and I am glad that the Holy Spirit is with me to intercede and bring clarity!

Father, this morning I do again lift my voice to you.  I am so grateful for all you have given and that you are my Father.  I am so grateful that you keep everything running right.  I have seen you work miracles over and over as I face the tasks you set before me.  Today I am facing what feels like Mount Everest, but I know even that is not bigger than you!  Please Father, guide my thoughts and my activities this day that I remain in your will and best meet the needs of those I serve.  I've seen miracles even the past few days and I am SO grateful for them!  And I know that you will continue to keep everything running right as you have promised.  Father, you know the miracles I need this day.  You've been so generous that I hate to ask for more, but I remember Paul's advice to: "keep on coming boldly to the throne of grace, so that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." (Hebrews 4:16 ISV)  So that is what I'm doing, Father.  I know only through your guidance this day will I know how to move forward and have the ability to do so.  Thank you, Father!

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